A Parent's Response to the Recovering Alumni Bloggers, Pt.1

I recently came across the Recovering Alumni blog (RA). Actually they found me after I wrote abvout my support for the Teen Mania's Honor Academy. Written by students who attended Teen Mania's internship, the RA blog accuses the ministry of emotionally, spiritually, and physically abusing their interns. As a parent with a son at the Teen Mania's Honor Academy, I read the blog to try and understand the position of kids who declared they had to “recover” from the Honor Academy. I'm troubled, not only by the statements coming from this blog, but by the damage that's happening within the body of Christ, between groups who are now at odds because of misunderstanding, and emotionally painful events. These actions aren't consistent with a heart focused on building the kingdom.

As a Christ follower, I've come face to face with my own frailty and sinfulness. Paul wrote in Romans 7 a list of things that like the apostle, I would like to do that I don't do, and another list of things I want to pull out of my life, that I continue to fight with. I want to do good, but at some level I see that the power to do good isn't present within me at all. While some think that Paul wrote this lament about his pre-conversion years, I believe he was being honest, and transparent with a believer's on-going struggle with sin. The only source of deliverance, healing, joy or victory is in Christ. Romans 8:1 should be the victory cry of every Christian's heart. There is therefore no condemnation in Christ. God doesn't condemn us, and therefore we shouldn't feel condemned by, or accuse other Christ-followers. We are truly free from the world, the flesh, and the power of the devil thought Jesus.

So, as I read the RA blog, I tripped over these three questions. First, “What happened to this group of young believers to turn them onto such an accusatory path?” If God doesn't condemn us, and we are called to become more like Him through the power of his Spirit, what happened to a sincere group of His children? Their words seem intent to wound and damage. And since our words come from what is deep within out own hearts, what happened that they would turn on the ministry which sought to build the kingdom in and through them? I think one key lies on the book of Proverbs that says a wounded brother is harder to be won than a walled city (Prov 18.19), and in Paul's charge to beware of a root of bitterness, that can spring up and defile many friends and onlookers (Heb 12.14-16).

My second question was “What is the outcome of this conversation if the wrangling continues unabated?” As I read RA's assertions that a national professional cult psychologist determined from their stories that HA was an abusive cult, I asked, “Where is this going? If the RA bloggers accuse, and the HA responds to defend themselves, the only possible result is an escalating conflict that would further wound and damage both sides. And isn't that Satan's goal for the kingdom? Isn't he the accuser of the brethren ( Rev 12.10)? Somehow this conversation is sliding sideways, and like the church that splits over the style of music that's played, or the color of new carpet in the sanctuary, the real issues lie beneath the surface.

My third question was “What can I do about it?” I recently visited my son for the Honor Academy's Ring Ceremony, and sat in the auditorium proudly as he graduated a few months later. He returned to HA as a graduate intern after raising more support, and now is home, working with a local church to revive their struggling youth program. I've walked with God for more than three decades after living for myself and the world for my first two. I've seen friends, movements and churches come and go because of cultish doctrines, outright error and unconfessed sin. I've seen other ministries begin with a small, passionate core, and grow into multi-service, multi-campus churches. I can say without question that Teen Mania's Honor Academy fits into this latter category. Doctrinally and culturally, they are solidly evangelical, biblical and fundamental in their approach to the Bible. Every year, thousands of young people come to a saving faith in Christ because of Teen Mania's outreach across the country. Looking back to God's Word, Jesus invited us to evaluate a tree by its fruit, and HA's annual harvest is outstanding.

Yet I've also seen how unforgiveness and misunderstanding can damage believers who had high expectations of their Christian faith, and their leaders. These wounds diminish and marginalize the power and reputation of the body of Christ. I've watched friends walk away from their once vibrant life in Christ because of not dealing with emotional wounds, some of which were perpetrated by those they trusted, their pastors or spiritual leaders. I've learned within my own life when I carry high expectations, I am greatly exposed to the risk of (catastrophic) failure.

I could shrug my shoulders, shake my head and say that, like a marriage that ends in divorce: “That's just what happens sometimes. People misunderstand each other and then move on.” The problem I have is God expects more of His children. He calls us upward, toward a higher example of love and life. We still are subject to the same temptations, and being human, we can wound each other just as deeply as those outside the church. But we are called to a better and different life. And when God calls, He also equips. So for me, standing on the sidelines when I have a personal connection to HA and a deep compassion for those who pen the RA blog isn't an option. I can't change anything, but my God can. Because I believe that my Father equips and calls me (and you) to make a difference in the world, I'm hoping my words might quell the conflict between these two groups, and maybe catalyze the beginning of healing, forgiveness and restoration.

Over the next couple weeks, I'll fill in these ideas. I'm writing to the RA bloggers, the HA staff, and to the parents of HA interns. It's when we lay down our rights, lead by serving, give to and forgive those who hurt us that we build Jesus' kingdom in his image. Standing on the side of the road throwing verbal salvos at one another – well – Jesus encountered a bunch of religious folk carrying rocks. He didn't think too much of their behavior either.

(to be continued)